Friday, October 15, 2010

Day 5- your first love

Can I say my first horse?
Ok, seriously...
Let me start by saying that I don't believe that your first love is necessarily true love.
Neither is your first real relationship.
My freshman year in high school, I dated a senior whom I met on the cross country team. Although he was a nice guy, he was constantly putting me down.. telling me that I was immature because I was so much younger than him, and making me feel like I wasn't good enough. I know I wasn't immature, I have always been way too mature for my age, but what I didn't realize at the time was that I was naive. There was an adrenaline rush from being the girl who was dating the older guy, but something didn't feel right. When he left for college, he broke up with me, and honestly, I was relieved.
A few months later, halfway through my sophomore year, one of my guy friends brought a new guy to church.. and we hit it off right away. I guess I'd say he was my first love. I always wanted to date the quarterback, and I loved being the envy of all the girls in our church group. We were officially together for about a year and a half, and unofficially for about 6 months after our breakup. We definitely had our good times, but we also had a lot of bad ones. Everyone has different definitions of cheating, but in my opinion, he cheated. That was just one of our problems
One thing that I have realized about myself recently is that I carry past pains with me. When I met Chris, I was at an all time low. I was dissapointed in the person I had let others push me to become... And because of that, I expected Chris to be just the same. Obviously, he wasn't. He surprises me every day with his love- he truly is one of a kind. Not only does he treat me better than anyone else, but he makes a patient effort to take away the pain that others have inflicted on me.
My husband is my first true love. I never knew love until I met him, and I will never know any other. <3

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